The Bachelor Episode VIII: Brad's Final Four

This season is in the home stretch as we settle into the hometown dates. With the Food Writer and CEMII cut last week, we are left with the Sh/Chantels, the Dentist (more on that later) and our next Bachelorette, Emily. Before the dates, Brad lists his concerns with each woman:

• Chantal can be “emotional”
• Ashley needs too much reassuring
• Shawntel works with dead people
• Emily’s past may set the bar too high

Chantal’s Wedding Crashers themed Hometown Date

And now for the required picture of the Space Needle (this reminds me, watch Portlandia on IFC).

Chantal welcomes Brad to her home where we find out that Brad is a liar. Chantal has a cat, Jinxie, that does what cats do – look bored/annoyed. Chantal has two dogs, Boca and Bailey, that lead to Brad’s lie. The friends of WWT were able to uncover this photo of Chantal’s dog

Brad’s response: “That is the cutest dog.” False. There is no way in hell Brad though that. Mrs. Dugan believes that Chantal could pull a Kate Hudson in How to Lose a Guy in Ten Days by womanizing Brad’s Austin Loft. While Chantal’s parents live four streets away, they live a world apart. The coolest part was that ABC managed to get Todd Cleary and Kathleen Cleary from Wedding Crashers to stand in for Chantal’s brother and mother.

This may look familiar, but this is Brad and Chris Harrison discussing the Chantal Hometown date.

Dad or Step-Dad Mike offers up Chantal pretty quickly - without Brad having to ask – and would be “proud to have him as my son in law.” Enough said.

Ashley’s Maine Event

Perhaps Brad and Ashley did not want to run into Reid or Droopy Dog in Philadelphia like faithful blog readers Michelle and Dave did recently because the Dentist brought Brad to Madawaska, Maine. This should not be confused with nearby Madawaska, New Brunswick, Canada.

Brad gets tested on his French (fails) and eats some Poutine which Dugan will gladly try once off the diet. Madawaska takes “small town” to a new level with goods being sold curbside on the honor system. However, Dentist Ashley’s father drops the bombshell of this episode with a little, “she’ll finish her schooling” when referencing her career options in Austin. We have been duped all season. Dentist Ashley is not a dentist!!!  Dentist Ashley appears to be Dental Student Ashley. While adding “student” makes her hotter, Dugan is having trouble getting past the lies.

Shawntel’s Chico Death Spiral

Perhaps Shawntel foreshadowed their future with a meeting at the Mausoleum. But Brad “loves it here.” It being Chico, not the funeral home. Brad “doesn’t handle death well” but manages to lie on the embalming table where Shawntel gives a pretty thorough explanation of her job. Dugan gives Brad props for going through with it. I assume the producers needed to add an extra 0 in the check for this week.

Shawntel’s Dad’s mustache was my highlight in Chico. Dugan was expecting Clyde Frasier and Keith Fernandez to turn up at any minute. Shawntel’s father gives an impassioned plea for her to stay in Chico, but Shawntel is dead set on a future with Brad. Only time will tell.

Emily’s Brad as Dad Tryout in Charlotte

Brad think he is going to win over Ricky with a kite, but he gets the added benefit of Dugan’s affection! Dugan has a soft spot for kites and this allows me to show off the greatest kite in the world. If Brad had bought little Ricky the kite (shown below), Emily and Ricky would never have let Brad leave, and the season may be over.

Brad lets Ricky win Candyland and is on fire. Nothing can screw this up. He has Emily swooning and the kid asleep. But Bradmund Freud shows up. Bradmund over-analyzes and a Bachelor/Next Bachelorette hookup becomes a “talk” about their feelings. Thanks for showing up, Bradmund.

And to the rose ceremony in New York:

1. Dentist turned Dental Student Ashley
2. Emily . . .

 It’s a Chantal v. Shawntel Showdown.

3. Chantal takes it.

 Shawntel’s run is dead. Until next week from Africa.