Okay, let's get back to the task at hand. It's time to do some french kissing on the beach. Sean started off the show by asking the delicious question, "How often do you get to fly into St. Croix in a sea plane?" The answer is obviously never, but I wish it was every day.
Solo Date #1: AshLee Top 3
After AshLee got the date card, the Tierrorist dropped a dirty bomb and called AshLee a cougar because AshLee is 32. As a fellow 32 year-old, I'm offended on AshLee's behalf.
But don't worry AshLee fans, Sean says he has seen her "vulnerability and her strength." (ABC production side-note: As Sean said that quote, the cameras were directly on AshLee's bikini butt).
Back at the hotel, the other girls can't get over that Tierrable is sleeping on a cot. How could Sean ever choose a girl that sleeps on a cot!?
Unfortunately, back on the date, AshLee was also talking about Tierrable. AshLee said that Tierrable is a "pouty pants."
At the beachfront tiki torch dinner, AshLee said she has the dreaded "one more thing to tell Sean before the hometown dates." We paused the show to make guesses. I think she was married before. Mrs. Wags guesses that she's Christian (WEAK! SO OBVIOUS!).
And the answer was: I'm right! (But Mrs. Wags probably was too). She was married. The real scandal was that she got married her junior year and was divorced by her senior year.
AshLee, attempting to solidify her nickname, screamed that she loves Sean. Per ABC rules, Sean merely replied, "I know." Ladies and Gentlemen, television does not get much more romantic than that.
Solo Date #2: Tierrable
Tierrable started off her date with Sean trying the street foods of St. Croix. If you eat too much street food in St. Croix, you need to watch out for Raja Bell's Revenge
Sean confronted Tierra about her reputation in the house, igniting an emotional powder keg for later in the episode. Watch out trash-talking bachelorettes, the Tierrorist is going to be on the loose.
Later in the (boring) date, Tierrable said she's falling in love with Sean. Sean, in another ABC required response said, "I've had so much fun today." Nothing like an unnatural response to a fake sentiment to make a relationship appear real.
Group Date: Lennay Kekua, Say Yes to the Des, and Lindsay
Before the group date began, Sean snuck into the ladies' rooms at 4 am to take pictures of the girls without makeup. Amazingly, this seems information a guy in his position might want to know. Cheers to you, Likable Sean.
After the unwelcome surprise, Sean took the three ladies out to see the sunrise. After that predictably lovely sight, Sean proved that he has learned a few things about manual transmissions by driving the ladies around the rural island of St. Croix. Jeep paid Super Bowl style money to sponsor this date.
On the beach portion of the date, Sean said he never thought he would fall for the girl that wore the wedding dress on the first night (Lindsay). Surprisingly, Sean actually does seem really into her. Maybe he has a thing for foot and wrist tattoos.
Lennay Kekua buzz-killed the date by talking about her dad's suicide attempt. I'm not willing to buzz-kill the blog by discussing it further, but I felt that you, our valued reader, needed to know.
Say Yes to the Des cried about how much she loves her family. And then she cried some more. And then she cried about it. Boo hoo.
The only date rose of the night went to Lindsay. We get to meet crazy Lindsay's crazy family.
Solo Date #3: Lesley Abramoff
The date card said that Sean hopes their relationship can stand the test of time. How cool would it be if Sean had arranged a time-travel date? (Blog author nerd alert).
The date took them to a ruined fruit factory. (It may also have been a "roof" or "root" factory. We couldn't hear it clearly). Frankly, none of those three types of factories makes any sense.
Lesley Abramoff was on the verge of telling a family secret, but could not pull the trigger. A potential hometown date scandal? Yes please.
Sister Shay
Sean's sister visited St. Croix. She asked Sean if he could narrow it down to one or two girls. Sean said, "I could see myself marrying all six." Though ABC obviously makes Sean say this, we are getting into the territory of things-Sean-said-during-the-show-that-are-majorly-detrimental-to-a-post-TV-real-relationship. Shay, a Bachelor genius and hopefully a future blog contributor, tells Sean that he should beware of girls that cause drama in the house.
Tierrable vs. AshLee Top 3
AshLee got real on Tierrable and said that Tierra changes when Sean comes around. Tierra replied, "men love me." AshLee said that she'd had enough of Tierra's stares and "raised eyebrows." Using the overly defensive logic of a 1st grader, Tierra yelled, "I can't control my eyebrow!" Botox has that effect.
Sean then consoled Tierra by telling her that he's been crazy about her since the first night and that he really cares about her....and therefore he's sending her home. Not the most logical thought process, but the right choice nonetheless.
Tierrable left in the van crying and blaming the other women all the way. What a wonderful set up for the Bachelor reunion episode.
Rose Ceremony
Sean, confident in his decision tonight, does not need a cocktail party. Sorry ladies, no free chardonnay this evening.
In addition to visiting Lindsay's hometown, we will also being headed to the hometowns of Say Yes to the Des, Lennay Kekua (she exists!), and Ashlee Top 3 (the nickname is alive, but so is the crazy).
Sadly, goodbye to Lesley Abramoff. She was one of the more likable contestants in recent memory, and maybe a dark horse for next Bachelorette.
Weird moment of the night: Lennay sobbed about Lesley leaving because Lesley has more in common with Sean than she does. If Lennay really feels that way, why is she still on The Bachelor, ABC's hit reality search for true love?
Until next week, in hometowns all around the USA.
Posts
There was a lot of twitter discussion regarding how great this episode was. I have to disagree. I thought each of the dates was boring. Mrs. Dugan and I had a discussion about this. Obviously, the dates are edited for a theme and yesterday's theme was the exit of the Tierrarist. For example, Ash Top 3 spend the day on the beach with Sean. The only thing they showed was them talking about Tierrable. I find that hard to believe or the beginning of an awful relationship.
ReplyDeleteI am sad for the loss of one of my favorite contestants ever, Abramoff. I believe their date was to a rum factory. I could also have heard wrong. Mrs. Dugan pointed out that Sean wants to play a hero role and that Abramoff simply didn't need saving like our army brat, abandoned/abused orphan AshLee, Lennay's tragical ride, and Say Yes to the growing up on the mean streets of poverty.
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