I am blogging on the road this week as Casa de Dugan is being tented for termites. The show is also on the move as we have traveled to Hispaniola (the acceptable side for tourists, La Republica Dominicana) for fantasy sweet dates with the final three contestants: John Deere, Hans, and Josh Griffey Jr.
Andy gives her rundown of the remaining guys and makes it painfully obvious that her final choice will be Josh.
Josh
She "likes Josh". He’s "her type". She's "attracted to him". She "can be her complete self with Josh". She "feels over the moon, giddy, unbelievebale". Their relationship is "easy, natural, exciting…"
Can we just give him the final rose and end this?
John Deere
Amazing guy, sweet, smart, lighthearted and funny. "So cute
and charming and romantic." He's the "Farmer/Businessman who has it all."
Just put him out of his misery. She sounds like she is explaining a labradoodle not a guy she will end up with.
Nick Hans
Shy, skeptical. Memorable. Sweet, affectionate. Serious. "He just gets me".
Mental connection. Passionate side. Falling in love. Potential
From the early explanations, it looks like a Josh/Hans showdown but let's review the dates and decide.
Hans Gets a Helicopter Date
It's getting late in the season to have an eventual winner without a helicopter date so it was nice to see Hans get his. Andi explains to the viewers that she wants more information about Hans' previous breakups.
I always want to know more about the production of these episodes. Hans and Andi start making out in the helicopter. Helicopters are not very large. The cameraman appears about a foot away. Is this awkward? Does it just become normal?
They have a long discussion about Hans terrible breakup. Let me guess? You pretended to be in love with a girl shortly after meeting her, even to the point of getting engaded, then secretely plot to steal business opportunities from her older sister. Once exposed, you go full evil and attempt to kill the older sister only to be blocked by the younger sister and former fiance. Eventually Hans returned to Milwaukee to be punished for his wrongdoings.
While his story may lead others to ask many questions...I only have one. Who the hell spends this much time at the beach without sunglasses? How in God's name are you on the beach for any length of time without
sunglasses?
At dinner, Hans shared a story he wrote for Andi. While the story was nice and included a page about their date that very same day, I was more impressed with Hans' illustrations. Did he
really draw these pictures? If he didn't, how is that assignment explained to the staffer at Fleiss & Co.?
Hans hides behind a tree, drops the L bomb and gets the fantasy suite time.
Josh Manages to Find a Baseball Field on a Date...AGAIN
The Dominican Republic was Dugan's first foreign county and I'll always remember it fondly. Josh and Andi walk around the capital, Santo Domingo. I know he rightly takes a beating from modern historians but Christopher Columbus' tomb is a magnificent monument. It could also double as a movie prop for the next National Treasure movie.
Fucking of course Josh finds a baseball field. This further cements Josh as the winner. He obviously loves baseball and Andi manages to find a baseball field on every date. She cares about him and their relationship seems genuine. Let's ignore the rest of their baseball date and list some D.R. beisbol greats:
- Big Papi
- Pujols
- Pedro
- Cano
- Sosa
- Hanley
- Jose Reyes
- Big Vlad
Who would you take from that group? L Bomb #2 leads to the Quote of the Night! Josh explains he isn't just throwing around the "love" word without meaning: "I never said that before when I really meant it."
I'll be very surprised if Josh does not win. Like lebron leaving Miami for Cleveland surprised. I also don’t think Josh would expose himself and become this
vulnerable without knowing he was winning in the end.
John Deere and the 3,000 lb Horses of Rancho Peligro
Mrs. Dugan and Andi share a healthy fear of horses. However, Andi's fear is also completely irrational and offers up what would be the best quote on any other night (hat tip up above to Josh): “There’s just something about a 3,000 pound animal
underneath me and I don’t know what they are thinking.”
3,000 lbs? What breed of horse is this?
Did anyone else notice the beautiful mountain landscape on this date? Why are there mountains in Cuba, Dominican Republic and other subtropical locales but not in Florida?
- Britton Hill, located in the Florida Panhandle, is the highest point in Florida at 345 feet
- More than one-third of the Dominican Republic lies higher than 1,500 feet (457 metres), and it has the highest relief of the West Indies, reaching 10,417 feet (3,175 metres) at Duarte Peak in the Cordillera Central in the Dominican Republic.
- Cuba's highest point is 6,578 feet.
The rest of the date can be summed up.
Let's pray that Josh wins so we can have Andi Murray.
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Well this is interesting. I think we may have our biggest disagreement of our bachelor blogging careers. I left this episode confident that the final winner would be Hans, not Josh. Dugan appears confident that Josh is a sure thing. My reasoning: Andi really seemed to get it on with Hans, but seemed to be a little frigid with Josh (comparatively). Either way, it's set up to be a great finale because I dislike both guys. It's just better that way.
ReplyDeleteFor the record Mrs. Wags agrees with me. Also for the record, Mrs. Wags was genuinely surprised to learn that John Deere's name was "Chris" during this episode. Once again proving that I make her watch the show.
The 3,000 pound horse and quote of the night about never really meaning that he loved someone scored big laughs out here on the west coast also.
Hans wrote a children's book that looked illustrated by professionals. Dugan nicknamed him (accurately) after a Disney movie. It might be the most amazingly appropriate and prophetic nickname ever given on the show at an early stage. Bravo Dugan.
Is Josh more of a baseball player or is Andi more of a lawyer?
There were two heart shaped reefs in the shallow waters of the Dominican. Were those real? (I googled it, and they appear to be real. SO ROMANTIC! Just like the show).
I can't wait until Neil Lane. Two weeks!
Andi Murray. That's too good.
Well, well, well. A true disagreement. I do think she is intrugued by Hans as it is not her "normal" type. But if she wanted to go with a different choice, she would have gone with the farmer.
ReplyDeleteWhile we know this show is about true love, the final couple will likely date and break up within a few months. That's the proven track record. Is she going to go through the hoops with a long distance relationship? It's easier for her to pick Josh. Josh lives in Atlanta. She doens't have to take a new bar exam. She has admitted that he is her type. I also think it was poignant that she was her true self with Josh, warts and all.
When with Hans, it's almost as if she is playing the part of a princess. Boom. Frozen.
Most important, though, is my belief that the show recently has shown Josh to be vulnerable. I do not believe Josh would allow that without knowing he was the eventual winner.
I can't wait to see who is correct. I also think think this is a good reminder for our fans that spoilers ruin the show. I looked at Reality Steve one season and didn't enjoy the show nearly as much.
Meow.