The Bachelor Episode 9: Jamaica Mistaica

We are in the Caribbean and have three women left: Software Caila, LB and JoJo Trump. Caila is the best fit. LB is the girl he couldn't get in real life. And JoJo has to be the frontrunner for the next Bachelorette.

Caila and Ben and the Sounds of Silence



Ben and Caila go whitewater rafting with a Rastafarian guide. The anxiety of the overnight and Caila's hesitance to share her feelings lead to a silent raft trip. The jerk chicken stand doesn't even loosen Caila up and we are beginning to fear this overnight might end well. Alas, dinner and copious amoubts of alcohol turned the night around. Thank you, Fleiss & Co.

Alcohol brings about the first L bomb of the night. No reciprocation from Ben but he's willing to test out the software...if you catch my drift. Ben drops a nice quote that makes me laugh in hindsight: "I could wake up and know tonight that Caila’s the women for me….”

It should have continued ..."But I’m still going to sleep with the other two women." Ben thought this but did not say it on national tv. Morning included more "love" talk from Caila and continued lack of a response from Ben.

LB, Ben and Mel at Gibraltar Beach

Turtles can live for 100 years. I like that fact. LB hopes her relationship with Ben lasts that long.
LB is not good at biology but Ben's more interested in anatomy anyway.

Do you want to know why LB wins? DOUBLE RAINBOW. Boom. Followed by a Reggae band and a Fantasy Suite with LOVE RECIPROCATION. There are no rules.

Ben, JoJo and Their Second Helicopter Date

Ben and JoJo enjoy some water-falling action in Jamaica and it appears to be a fairly typical overnight date until we have a second LOVE RECIPROCATION on the show. Does Ben see the cameras filming this season? Ben needs a guide. He needs Neil Lane!

I don't make many promises but Ben's relationship stemming from this season will not last. This date also included the QOTN from JoJo Trump (fitting) with an assist to Mrs. Dugan's ear. “It feels so nice to hear you talk”  What?

Goodbye Caila and a Group Hug

Caila's gone and LB & JoJo enjoy a too familar group hug. They are pretty comfortable ending up as the winner and next Bachelorette. I want spice. I want action. I want drama. Bring me the Women Tell All.